Theory of Comparative Roommates

As you may have gathered, imaginary readers, I'm a college student, and, as such, I live in a dorm (or "residential hall" as we call them here at the U, to "facilitate community" or some bullshit like that). In my case, this means that I have a randomly assigned roommate, with whom a share a 200 sq. ft. room with two beds, two desks, and all of our stuff. So far, I haven't had any real issues with [Random Roommate #2], but some recent events have got me thinking about general roommate ettiquette, because, this year so far has been really different than living with [Clothes Don't Fit] last year, and I feel like I'm having to figure out a whole new set of rules as I go along, all of which I should already know.

Last year, I also got paired with a random roommate, [Clothes Don't Fit], and we got along really well, we were friends even. She's a Mech E major, so we had nearly the same classes, and we had similar interests, and, initially, the same group of people we hung out with, although she more so than I. Anyways, it was nice to be friends with my roommate, and, as neither of us were in relationships, nor prone to come home drunk or with a stranger, we didn't have to deal with any of the common awkward roommate circumstances.

This is not to say that she was the perfect roommate, I did have some issues with her, particularly towards the end of the year. She would never have her keys with her, and then, when I would leave or go to bed and lock the door, she would blame me for locking her out, despite the fact that it was her fault for not having her keys. She was a complete slob, and her half of the room was a total disaster, with the floor covered in her stuff and a perpetual stack of dirty dishes that she never washed.

I guess that my main problem with her was that she is one of those people that I can't spend a huge amount time with without wanting to punch in the face, which I mostly express by being a passive aggressive bitch. This doesn't happen with most people, as I can usually spend infinite amounts of time with anyone that I enjoy being around and never stop enjoying being around them, but for a few people in my life, after spending a ton of time around them, I realize that I never really liked them in the first place, and I can't stand being in their presence. This happened with [Quiet Raver] in high school, and then again with [Clothes Don't Fit] last year. I tried really hard to not let it show, because we did have to live together, but I'm sure she noticed, and I do feel bad for irrationally disliking her towards the end of the year.

Anyways, all of that was a long-winded and circuitous way to talk about what I originally intended to talk about, my current roommate, [Random Roommate #2]. She's a freshman, and an art major, and, while we get along well enough, we don't really talk, and we aren't friends, which is fine with me. All I care about is us not hating each other. But, unlike [Clothes Don't Fit], she goes out on the weekends, and she parties, and she has sex, none of which I care about, but it does raise a whole new set of issues that I didn't have to deal with last year.

All of this became eminently clear to me this weekend, when, on Friday she told me that her friend [Bieber Hair] was coming over on Saturday and he would be staying the night, if it was alright with me. I was fine with it, and I was glad she asked, and I had plans that accounted for most of Saturday anyways, so it wasn't an issue. I did wonder if [Bieber Hair] was more than just a friend, but it wasn't my business, so I didn't ask.

Just like she said, he was around Saturday afternoon when I got back from Quiz Bowl, and from the amount of time they spent in her bed the few times I was in the room, I gathered that they were more than just friends. I gave them space, and I ended up spending the night at [Львица]'s place, so it wasn't super awkward. They only really awkward bit was when I got home on Sunday morning and could hear them having sex in the shower.

I'm actually not sure how they managed it, given that our shower is TINY.

Here's the thing. I don't care that her (boy?) friend was over for the weekend. It seemed like he was from out of town, and they deserve to be able to spend time in the room without me being around and making things weird. What bugs me is that she didn't even imply that they were going to be having sex. If she had even hinted that she wanted some alone time with him, I would have taken all of my stuff with my on Saturday morning and not come back until Sunday night. I would have cleared out and respected their time together, but because all she said was that he was her friend, I took that at face value, and didn't automatically assume that she wanted the room.

Did I just not read the situation correctly? I feel weird assuming that just because her friend was a guy they would be having sex, but was that what I was supposed to assume? I mean, if it were me, I would ask her for some space for the weekend, and hope that she respected that request, for the sake of us both. I don't know. I really want to be a good roommate and respect her space when she needs it, in hopes that she returns the favor, but if she doesn't tell me, I can't do anything about it. I am not, in fact, a mind reader, much to my chagrin.

Fun fact, "Roommates" is one of the many seemingly simple words that I can never spell correctly on the first try. Something about the two o's and then the two m's. It's just confusing.